Tag Archives: mystery hotel review

Why do hotels find it so hard to maintain standards?

Bad hospitality experiences are as much a part of British life as wet summer days and queuing. In my freelance role of mystery hotel reviewer, I work with national chains and boutique establishments, road-testing their facilities before producing in-depth reports of my findings.

I fully accept that it’s hard to maintain the highest standards of quality and service at all times, given the vagaries of suppliers, wear and tear, previous guests and staff shortages. However, some of the issues I’ve encountered could have been easily avoided – or addressed far more effectively once they’d actually happened…

Five cautionary tales

Some of the events below happened while I was conducting mystery hotel reviews, but others occurred as a business or leisure guest. While I could have named and shamed the chains and brands involved in this list, I haven’t done so, since discretion remains a cornerstone of being a mystery hotel reviewer long after you’ve wiped your feet on the way out…

Issue #1: Broken soap dispenser in room.

Cause: Lack of regular maintenance.

How the hotel responded: Someone went into my room while I was having dinner, concluded the dispenser was indeed broken, didn’t fix it and walked out without closing the door behind them (leaving my £1,300 laptop on view to anyone walking down the corridor). They marched into the restaurant, pointed at me and shouted “your soap dispenser’s broken, so you’ll have to lean over the bath and use that one”, while food fell off the fork of the astonished woman sitting at the next table.

How the hotel should have responded: Called a handyman to fit one of the spare soap dispensers they should have kept in stock as soon as housekeeping noticed it wasn’t filling properly. And then closed the room door behind them. And maybe left me a note, rather than bellowing at me across a restaurant and giving every other diner the mental image of me performing bizarre stretches across a bath.

Issue #2: Giant spider in shower.

Cause: Inadequate cleaning.

How the hotel responded: The receptionist shuddered and said there was nobody who could deal with it. I spent the night in a room with Schrodinger’s spider – either in the shower, or not in the shower. I didn’t use the shower. I never went back to this hotel. Maybe the spider’s still there, all these years later? Perhaps that room became its personal fiefdom, forever off-limits to bipeds?

How the hotel should have responded: Invested £10 in a spider catcher capable of reaching the high ceilings in this once-grand Victorian building, before training their cleaners (one of whom had just cleaned the bathroom) how to safely catch and release arachnids. An apology or the offer of a room change would have been welcome, while the spider might have appreciated a newspaper to read.

Issue #3: Unacceptable food preparation and presentation.

Cause: Inadequate training or supervision.

How the hotel responded: Despite a menu promising a “delicious pancake stack” served teetering on a fruit-laden plate, the chef sent out two small and overcooked pancakes without any fruit, coulis, sauces, decoration or accompaniments. The waiter didn’t even look embarrassed – perhaps this tragic sight was a common occurrence.

Neither delicious, fruit-laden nor a stack

How the hotel should have responded: Set minimum standards for food at the pass, ensuring every dish meets pre-determined size, presentation, cooking, temperature and hygiene requirements. I appreciate staffing issues are rife throughout the hospitality sector, but this was clearly the action of someone who turned up for work without a shred of interest, pride or commitment to their role.

Issue #4: Given the key to someone else’s room at check-in.

Cause: Staff not paying attention.

How the hotel responded: When I returned to reception and said, “the room key you’ve just given me is for the wrong room and I’ve just walked in on someone sleeping”, the receptionist’s response was indifferent at best. Grudging apologies and a replacement room card which…well, why don’t we try door number two and see what (or who) awaits?

How the hotel should have responded: Immediately called management to issue sincere apologies to all parties, before scheduling retraining for reception staff to ensure an occupied room cannot have extra keys allocated to new arrivals. I could have been anyone. To the sleeping woman in the bed, I was anyone. Certainly not someone she wanted walking in on her, though I’m great company.

Issue #5: No space in car park.

Cause: Constrained site boundaries.

How the hotel responded: Filled a car park originally intended for a dozen vehicles with two dozen vehicles, then employed one person to undertake a giant game of Tetris to extract my car from the centre of this solid mass of tightly packed metal. It took nearly an hour for me to get my car back after checkout – the accompanying photo was taken after several vehicles had already been disgorged. Pity the owners of the red Astra (far right), who were packing up ready to leave.

This was after two cars had already left

How the hotel should have responded: Either (a) sourced alternative space nearby, (b) made clear to guests that parking is limited to certain rooms or booking rates rather than trying to accommodate every single vehicle, (c) asked people to nominate an estimated checkout time and parked the cars in order of who was staying longest, or (d) employed more than one person to rescue vehicles. Waiting an hour for your car to be freed isn’t acceptable when people have appointments/flights/long drives home.

What are the underlying causes?

While issue 5 is arguably more to do with logistics and overpromising on available space, the first four come down to hotels not maintaining standards among their workforce. Staff sometimes do the bare minimum required of them – or even less than that – unless there are incentives to be more proactive or penalties for allowing standards to slip. The first four issues on my list all involve a lack of care – from housekeeping staff, maintenance teams, receptionists and chefs alike. I chose these particular issues because they span the breadth of hotel departments.

As a mystery hotel reviewer, I’m only allowed to report the facts as I find them. But when I do encounter soiled bedding, unhygienic food displays, mouldy grouting or broken appliances, I’m duty bound to report them. In this respect, mystery hotel reviews work well to generate feedback customers may be too polite/embarrassed/rushed to offer. Yet it’s a sad reflection on hospitality in the United Kingdom that mattress protectors remain optional, soundproofing is still patchy, service is frequently indifferent (at best) and three pieces of rind can be served as the sole dairy content of a cheeseboard. Until hotels dramatically improve their standards, mystery shoppers like me will remain essential in the quest for quality, consistency and basic decency.

Why businesses need mystery shoppers

Although G75 Media routinely works with clients as diverse as optometrists and DIY platforms, we list four core specialisms on our What We Do page. While we remain embedded in the property, automotive and technology sectors, our travel writing has waned in parallel with declining demand for professional travel journalists. Nowadays, vloggers like Shawn Sanbrooke have moved the dial away from written content, while print publications are more likely to publish paid-for advertorials than (potentially critical) travel journalism.

Yet one aspect of travel writing remains impervious to TikTok, generative AI and PR-led promotional content. Companies still need mystery shoppers – arguably more so now than ever, in an age where one negative review from a well-connected individual can cause significant reputational damage. Everyone’s a critic these days, and the best way of negating their criticism is to periodically ensure your customer-facing offerings are optimal. Staff will inevitably bring innate bias to the process of judging their own employers, while the general public can’t always be trusted to be objective; automated AI tools can’t help companies to discern public perceptions, either.

The golden standard

Objective reviews of customer-facing hospitality and leisure venues are produced by a small but dedicated army of mystery shoppers, including G75 Media’s founder, Neil Cumins. He’s recently been awarded Gold certification by one of the UK’s leading mystery guest platforms after reviewing hotels, bars and restaurants across north-west England and Scotland. This reflects Neil’s background as a seasoned travel writer, having previously written for tourism websites including 5pm.co.uk and YPlan, alongside travel publications from Food & Drink Guides to Group Leisure.

However, being a mystery reviewer involves far more than knowing when to use the fish fork, or how a pint of lager should be poured and served (at 45 degrees into a cold branded glass, served with the logo facing you). These are some of the skills required to succeed in an industry where you’re only ever as good as your last completed questionnaire…

1. Photography

A picture tells a thousand words, and it also offers pointers about where a venue might be going wrong. Food photography provides real-time snapshots of a venue’s catering staff, giving proprietors invaluable insights into what’s being served up to their customers. Mystery guests should supply visual evidence of whether pastry is well cooked, or whether pillows are encased in clean protectors. Neil’s twenty years of photojournalism experience has been invaluable in this regard.

2. Service

Many mystery dining/hospitality platforms issue lengthy surveys, potentially asking over a hundred different questions about a visit. Many of these relate to the service provided by staff – cordiality, efficiency, helpfulness, and so forth. Reviewers may be tasked with probing staff knowledge, taking notes of missed upselling opportunities and monitoring how quickly ad-hoc requests are actioned. This requires meticulous record-taking in a manner discreet enough to avoid anyone noticing.

3. Ambience

A hotel’s primary role is to provide comfortable overnight accommodation, while a restaurant’s is to serve tasty meals. Yet there’s so much more to consider regarding the overall experience. From parking to noise levels, from wait times to cleanliness, a mystery guest has to record every aspect of each venue. This means critiquing on-site toilets, testing the WiFi speed, judging temperatures and other nuanced elements that a less observant individual might not even consciously identify.

Alongside detective-like observation skills and the ability to record detailed notes without attracting anyone’s attention, mystery reviews tend to involve a great deal of open-ended reportage. This is where skills like brevity and eloquence battle for supremacy – painting a vivid picture in a limited number of words. An experienced travel writer can bring a two-dimensional review to life, but some mystery guest platforms require more exposition than others.

The personal touch

Finally, remember that mystery shopping reports and surveys can directly affect the staff members encountered in that visit. Critiquing discoloured grout in a hotel bathroom is very different to critiquing the efficiency of a waitress working a split shift while covering for an absent colleague. Reviewers need to be empathetic towards the people they encounter, especially when they’re asked to name employees in their reports. Anyone can have bad luck, or a bad day at the office.

If you have a venue that would benefit from mystery shopping, contact G75 Media to see how we can add value to your brand or business. If you work for a mystery review platform, we’d be delighted to discuss working together on ad hoc or ongoing assignments. Finally, budding writers seeking to break into the tightly knit community of mystery diners and freelance hotel reviewers should start by conducting their own analysis and writing up reports. As with many aspects of the hospitality sector itself, practice makes perfect…